December 2011
49 posts
LEGITIMATELY glad I asked people’s opinion on that joke. You people are smart & funny & I include those who didn’t like it in that gracious compliment.
A tweet
“I bet if Ronald Reagan had invented AIDS today, he would’ve given it to people who post pictures of their food online first.”
I would’ve put that on Twitter, but Twitter’s down. Do you think it’s funny? Why/why not?
The Greatest Hotel Review of All Time
My wife and I were looking for a hotel to have an overnight date at (that’s right) while her parents watched our baby. Her mom was helping out and found the greatest hotel review I’ve ever read. It’s REAL, but the site it’s on got overwhelmed by people I sent to it from Twitter and it hasn’t been working dependably. IT IS TOO IMPORTANT FOR PEOPLE NOT TO SEE AND STUDY...
140 Underrated Tweeters
tracymarquez:
Every end of the year Twitter list of “who to follow” always includes every person we already follow. So I decided to take it upon myself to make a list of 140 underrated, super funny tweeters with less than 20,000 followers. Enjoy. Follow. Share. And don’t suck dick for money.
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This is an amazingly funny list. Follow these folks. And follow Tracy!
Boston Globe clarifies non-beef between Matt Damon... →
brothersgreenberg asked: Enough with the political posts. It's the holidays! Can we get back to the dick jokes?
aardshark asked: I'm a dumb kid who's too young to do any open mics around me. What are things I can do instead to keep me doing comedy?
My letter to the Globe
Hi Guys, I see you wrote about my blog post. I would like to offer some clarification. My blog post went up two days before any reports of Damon’s comments in Elle. When his comments came to the news’s attention, I reposted my blog on Twitter, prefacing it, as you noted, “With respect to my fellow Bostonian, Matt Damon.” Although I am a comedian, my use of the word...
saxicoline asked: I'm also tall and terrible at basketball. What should I tell people who ask if / assume that I play?
My least favorite people (at this second) are people who feel Obama “let them down” or “didn’t deliver on his promise.” Guys, “HOPE” was a one syllable slogan, a logo even, to get a corporate backed, big D Democrat elected in a cash contest. People like you are THE SAME THING as the “undecided” Republican caucus voters in Iowa being...
Detailed article from Fast Company about the... →
...: Reasons why you should follow @juliasegal on... →
juliasegal:
1. I am a writer but don’t write much on this blog. Twitter is another creative outlet and I try to write on it everyday. I will make you laugh. On Tumblr I follow over 1,500 blogs and most of them are focused on other people’s talents in writing, art, fashion, etc. I love seeing your talents and…
You could read this whole thing or just follow her. I do. Because she’s...
Is female pubic hair slowly going extinct in...
iheartchaos:
Partly due to influences like porn, slimmer bikinis and changing sexual attitudes, it seems that more and more women are opting to go for the completely smooth hairless look downstairs. In the late 19th and early 20th centuries, as dresses and swimsuits became smaller, women shaving their legs and armpits suddenly became the thing to do, and here at the beginning of the 21st...
This will interest nobody but super Twitter nerds, but enough people ask me about it that I thought I’d do a wee post. Sometimes I repeat jokes on Twitter. This bothers some people. Granted, they are shit-breathed garbage people, as demonstrated by their taking the mental & caloric effort to write me about it, but 25 shit-breathed garbage people almost add up to one real person, so I...
I was a guest on Jason Nash’s excellent...
somewhatscrewy asked: When will your show be on Comedy Central?
s0methingyousecondguess asked: do you have a dvd, or a book? my dad wants one for christmas?
I finally have a Facebook "fan" page with tour... →
Facebook is a social media website.
TITLES CONSIDERED for MISSION IMPOSSIBLE: GHOST...
I’ll probably get in trouble for posting this, but I found a document at Paramount Pictures that lists the titles they considered for the new Mission Impossible film before settling on the excellent “Ghost Protocol.” Please repost in case they take it down from my site.
MISSION IMPOSSIBLE: LOAF PARAGRAPH
MISSION IMPOSSIBLE: PLOP CENTRIFUGE
MISSION IMPOSSIBLE: CUNT SULLIVAN
...
My Occupy LA Arrest by Patrick Meighan
darcibastiaan:
My name is Patrick Meighan, and I’m a husband, a father, a writer on the Fox animated sitcom “Family Guy”, and a member of the Unitarian Universalist Community Church of Santa Monica.
I was arrested at about 1 a.m. Wednesday morning with 291 other people at Occupy LA. I was sitting in City Hall Park with a pillow, a blanket, and a copy of Thich Nhat Hanh’s “Being Peace” ...
All my VICE columns in one place! Please repost?... →
These columns will dramatically change your life.
vecobl asked: I bet you are a terrific father! I love your humor.
buddythevalient asked: what'd you do for a living before you started comedy?
samjacksonfromjurrasicpark asked: Loved the GOP post. Thoughts on Ron Paul?
Thoughts on today's GOP
I am blown away! NEWSMAX, a website whose editorials today include “Obama’s War on Chrisianity” and an argument to privatize Social Security from Tea Party founder, Dick Armey, is sponsoring a GOP Presidential debate that will be moderated by Donald Trump!
Form your own opinions, but I’ll offer mine: this is emblematic of a party who is going to have an uphill bitch of a...
